Can I attend my non-Muslim grandma's funeral as a Muslim?
Yes, many scholars allow it. Attending a relative's funeral to honor them and support your family is an act of kindness. What you avoid are the religious rituals of another faith, like joining prayers, hymns or communion. You can sit respectfully, grieve, and comfort your family.
The Prophet ﷺ respected non-Muslim funerals
When a funeral procession passed by, the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ stood up. Someone told him it was the funeral of a Jewish man. He replied: "Is it not a living being (soul)?" (Sahih al-Bukhari 1312).
When his uncle Abu Talib, who never accepted Islam, passed away, the Prophet ﷺ told Ali: "Go and bury your father" (Sunan Abi Dawud 3214). Taking care of non-Muslim family at death is part of good character.
What you can do
- Attend the service and the burial.
- Sit quietly and respectfully during prayers and readings.
- Help your family with arrangements, food and guests.
- Share memories and speak well of your grandma.
- Cry. Grief is human, and the Prophet ﷺ wept for his loved ones too.
What to skip
- Joining in prayers, hymns or religious responses.
- Taking communion or making the sign of the cross.
- Praying for her forgiveness in Islamic terms. For that sensitive topic, see Can I pray for my non-Muslim mother after she dies?
- Alcohol at the reception or wake.
Standing up when others stand, out of respect, is generally fine. You don't have to recite anything.
What to say to your family
You don't need religious phrases. Simple, sincere words are best: "I'm so sorry. She was such a kind person." "I'll always remember her stories." "I'm here if you need anything." Your presence matters more than the exact words.
In the weeks after the funeral, check in on the relatives closest to her, especially your parents. A call or a visit often means more once the crowds have gone home.
Funerals in a church
Being inside a church for a funeral is allowed by many scholars, as long as you don't take part in worship. If prayer time comes during the day, step out and pray somewhere quiet. Also see Can I pray in a church if there's no mosque nearby?
- Attending a non-Muslim relative's funeral is allowed by many scholars.
- The Prophet ﷺ stood for a non-Muslim funeral.
- Don't join religious rituals of another faith.
- Comfort your family with simple, sincere words.
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