Can I still shake hands with the opposite sex as a Muslim?
It depends on which scholars you follow, but most say avoid it. The majority of scholars say Muslims shouldn't shake hands with unrelated people of the opposite sex. A minority of contemporary scholars allow a brief, polite handshake where refusing would cause real harm, like at a job interview. Either way, there are kind ways to handle it.
What the Prophet ﷺ did
Aisha said about the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ: "By Allah, the hand of Allah's Messenger never touched the hand of any woman" outside his family. Even when women pledged allegiance to him, he accepted it with words only (Sahih al-Bukhari 5288).
Based on this and on the Quran's guidance about modesty, most scholars from all four schools say not to shake hands with a non-mahram (someone you could marry).
The minority view
Some contemporary scholars, especially those living in Europe and the USA, say a quick, respectful handshake without any desire may be allowed when refusing would cause real harm, such as losing a job or deeply offending someone. Even these scholars usually say it's better not to initiate one yourself.
How to decline politely
- Hand on your heart: place your right hand on your chest, smile and nod. Many people already recognize this gesture.
- Say it warmly: "It's nice to meet you. For religious reasons I don't shake hands, but it's nothing personal."
- Get in first: greet with a smile and a nod before a hand comes out. It avoids the awkward moment.
- Hugs and cheek kisses: the same applies. A warm wave or verbal greeting works fine.
At work and in interviews
Most employers in Europe and the USA respect religious practices. If you're worried, you can mention it to HR or a manager ahead of time. You'll likely find people are more understanding than you expect. If you're unsure how to handle a specific situation, talk to a scholar or imam you trust. For other workplace questions, see Can I say "Merry Christmas" to my coworkers?
- Most scholars say don't shake hands with the opposite sex.
- The Prophet ﷺ didn't shake hands with women outside his family.
- A minority allow it when refusing causes real harm.
- A smile and hand on the heart is a kind alternative.
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