What is istikhara and should I pray it before marriage?
Istikhara is a short prayer asking Allah to guide you to what's best. It's highly recommended before big decisions, and marriage is one of the biggest. You pray two voluntary rak'ahs, then say a specific dua. Istikhara isn't about waiting for a dream: you also do your research, ask advice, and then move forward trusting Allah.
The sunnah of seeking guidance
A companion reported that the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ "used to teach us the way of doing Istikhara... in all matters as he taught us the Suras of the Qur'an" (Sahih al-Bukhari 1166). If he taught it for everyday matters, it's even more fitting for choosing a spouse. See Can I marry someone who doesn't pray?
How to pray it
- Pray two rak'ahs of voluntary prayer, at any time that isn't disliked for prayer.
- After the prayer, say the istikhara dua. In it you ask Allah, by His knowledge and power, to make the matter easy and blessed if it's good for your religion, life and future, and to turn it away from you if it's bad.
- Where the dua says "this matter," name it in your heart, for example "my marriage to [name]."
You can read the dua in Arabic or, if you don't know it yet, from a card or your phone. Many scholars say making the same request in your own language is still beneficial while you learn.
What happens next?
Many people expect a dream, a color or a strong feeling. Scholars say that isn't required. After istikhara, take the next reasonable step. If things keep becoming easier, that's a good sign. If doors keep closing, or serious problems appear, accept it as Allah's answer.
Istikhara plus advice
Istikhara isn't a replacement for using your mind. Ask about the person's character, talk to people who know them, and consult your wali or a trusted imam. Scholars often say: istikhara with Allah, and consultation with people. You can repeat istikhara several times if you're still unsure.
For more on choosing well, see Should I marry for love or for religion in Islam?
- Istikhara is two rak'ahs and a dua for guidance.
- It's a sunnah for any important decision.
- You don't need a dream or sign.
- Combine it with research and advice.
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